Things I've Learned- Pt 1
If I can remember (which I probably won’t because I’m so scatterbrained it’s pathetic), I’ll similarly caption future posts that pertain to things I’ve learned, and just add a part number (1,2,3). Seems like I learn something every day, but I’ll try to keep these posts to things that might help someone else instead of the minutia of my life. LOL
This might sound strange, but during the last weeks while I’ve been unable to write, I found that I was much better about reaching out to people. Don’t get me wrong. I’m concerned about my friends and loved ones on ALL days. I want to know how they are and how their hurts/problems/worries/lives are working out, but I always feel so busybusybusy that I haven’t really reached out NEARLY as often as I should’ve. But now I can see that should be my number one priority through the day–other people. Helping them, lifting their spirits, praying for them, showing even smallest kindness to someone. It matters, and it makes a difference not just to THEM, but to US as well.
Something else I’ve learned recently is that the more my thoughts turn toward my own worries, the bigger those worries feel. They grow and grow to the point that I feel consumed by them. But by focusing as much as I can on others during those moments when I might otherwise be tempted to fret, it sort of keeps things in perspective for me. What I’ve learned is that, in my humble opinion, it’s healthy to focus more on others than it is to focus solely on ourselves. That’s not to say we shouldn’t think about or take care of ourselves. I’m not saying don’t exercise, don’t shower, don’t tend to your own needs and responsibilities, never worry. That’s not at all what I mean. I’m focusing on myself in a big way now by making myself exercise every morning. During that time, I’m completely focused on bettering my body and my spirit. And when I work, I’m completely focused on my book. But there are a lot of minutes in the day when I don’t have to be so involved in my own problems, when I could reach out to a friend or family member, or even someone I barely know on FB who is suffering some kind of setback. Or heck, even reaching out to tell someone whose life is in better shape than mine that I’m thinking of them, wishing them even more blessings, and that I’m glad to have them in my world. Basically, I’ve learned that life is way better when we DO for others or DO with someone else in mind. Personally, I think that’s the key to TRUE happiness.
If you think I’m nuts, try it out. Just in some small. Let’s say for a week to start. For instance, if you’re married, try focusing a little more on your spouse than on yourself when you’re tempted to worry about something going on with you. Send him a random “I love you more than air” text or sneak over to his side of the couch for some cuddling. Do something you know he loves just to make him smile. I should warn you, though, this kind of thing can be addictive. That or I’m just plain nuts, which is HIGHLY LIKELY. LOL But seriously, I’ve found that bringing some kind of joy or relief to others is like crack. I’m not even kidding! A lot of them time, I feel like I’m walking on clouds after. That’s not to say that it’s a magic pill or that it ALWAYS feels that way. Some moods/days/emotions just can’t be salvaged that easily. LOL I am woman. Hear my ovaries cry. You know how that goes. But most of the time, it’s a good feeling that goes so deep, other stuff can’t touch it. It’s really weird, but I know I’m not the only one who feels this way. I’ve heard others say similar things, and I know exactly what they mean. And, truthfully, I think this is the way it SHOULD be. I think we were made this way. We’re made to feel great when we help someone else. It’s like its own kind of reward.
Anyway, I’m fairly positive I’m doing a terrible job of explaining this. To be a person who works with words for a living, sometimes blog posts just undo me. I’m not exactly sure this is the reason, but for the most part, I find it difficult to talk about myself. Almost as difficult as I find it to take pics of myself. Maybe this is why I don’t like social media. I already fail at the basic tenets of it.
ANYWHO, in unrelated news, I’m writing again.
Y’ALL, I’M WRITING AGAIN!
Truthfully, I can’t even describe what this means to me, what it feels like. I’ve never been one of those people who says I HAVE TO write. Like the stories or the characters HAVE TO come out. That’s not me. I’ve never felt that way. But boy! I can say that now! After these last weeks, I can genuinely say that I NEED to write. It’s just who I am. It’s part of my life and my days and my BEING. It’s part of my purpose. And when I’m not doing it, I feel lost. Adrift. Like no matter what I do, something just isn’t quite right. It’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced before and it’s a little scary. I can’t help thinking OMG WHAT WILL I DO IF I CAN NO LONGER WRITE? Dude, lemme tell ya, that kind of thinking will get me nowhere fast. LOL I can’t even go there. I’ll just say that it was a pretty miserable few weeks and I hope not to repeat it any time soon.
It was during that time, though, that I had to find good ways to cope with all this THOUGHT SPACE that I couldn’t fill with my stories. That’s when I decided I’d focus on getting in better habits (i.e., working exercise into my routine) and on keeping up better with the people I love. Showing love, saying love, living love. The funny thing is, I didn’t realize how much I missed those things in my life, how much RICHER life is when those things are a daily priority. Now I just have to keep that up. Already I can feel myself wanting to slip back into old routines, but I’m determined to maintain my healthier ways. It’s important to be balanced. I see that now more than ever. Life can’t be all about work or problems or really any ONE single thing. It’s a delicate dance between all sorts of things that are all important. They all need attention, but each one will vie for a higher position in our list of priorities. Every day, we just have to make sure we keep the things that SHOULD BE at the top, at the top, ya know?
Anyway, again, I’m sure I’ve done a terrible job of explaining this, but someone out there will get it. Someone out there might need it, so here it is. My own two cents. My own little experience on the road of life. I hope to have you an actual novel to read instead of my blog posts here before long.
On that note…
OMG I AM SO EXCITED! THIS BOOK IS EVERYTHING!!!! This is one of the top 2 favorite things I’ve ever written, and I can’t wait to finish it! Eeeeeeeeep
Until next time… happy reading! <3
